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Patience Is Solid Gold

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“Love Is Patient, Love is Kind” (NASB)

A young mother’s frustration often found release by shouting.

She had good reason for being frustrated as she was living like a single mother with several active and strong-willed children. With her husband always away for work, the children were slow to obey her and she often could not bottle up the pressure. Her loud and terrifying screams were often heard by the neighbors, who were worried about her mental health.

One day, she tried to study the Bible to find some help as she felt she was coming apart at the seams. She began to look up verses about patience. She had always felt she loved her children more than herself but came to see that she wasn’t loving them. She was very shocked by this discovery.

When she read: “Put on compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience” in , she felt even more pressure and started screaming. This caused her children to go and hide and a neighbor lady friend to come over wondering whether she had finally had a breakdown.

She felt she just couldn’t put on anything more.

The neighbor was a devout praying lady who came to hold her hand and pray with her, letting her know Jesus understood her needs and tenderly loves His lambs when they are overwhelmed. After a few minutes, the pressure seemed to lift as comfort and peace filled her young heart.

Things became clear when the sisters sat down together and the neighbor turned in her Bible to 1 Corinthians 13 and they read together: “Love is patient and kind” and “If I have all faith and knowledge and have not love I am nothing.” She began to understand that if she wasn’t patient and kind, she wasn’t loving her children. Right then and there she gave up on trying to understand how to be a good mother and opened her heart to Jesus and His Spirit. She began to feel the love, forgiveness, and patience that He had given to her was all she needed to share with her children to be a good mother.

She started obeying Jesus who had said: “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” ( ) She came with an open heart.

She gave up on having to run everything and chose to relax and love with a patient and kind heart for her home and children. She accepted “Whosever is slow to anger is better than the mighty;” and, its sister “Be not quick in your spirit to become angry.” She remembered that perfectionism got the devil kicked out of heaven when he wanted to run things. She didn’t have to be the “big momma” anymore. She decided that she wanted to be a Mary resting at Jesus’ feet and fellowshipping with Him and not a Martha who had to take charge and expect others to do as she said or else. Actually, she felt she had to be a Mary girl first so she could be the right type of Martha girl who ran a well-ordered home that would please both her loving Lord and her hard-working husband.

Frustration is a part of raising children, any mother can testify. The answer to frustration is not bearing down but is coming to the Lord’s comforting and waiting arms.

Copyright © 2018 Bob Segress, Ph. D, used with permission.

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About The Author


Robert L Segress, Ph.D., Th.M., served as a college professor (full-time and part-time) and psychotherapist for 25 years. He was the Director of Psychological Services of The Riverton General Hospital in Seattle, Washington and is an ordained minister who served as an interim pastor. He wrote The Biblical Approach to Psychology in 1974. After retiring, he became a prison minister at Shelton Prison in Washington State, in which capacity he has served for 15 years.

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