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In The Midst of Tragedy: Trust
“He was one of a kind; not just as a father, but just as a man in general. We were best friends, and I couldn't have had a better father son relationship / He was more than just a hero to me.”
Blake Faulkner adored his father, Brian. In the fifteen-year-old’s eyes his dad was invincible, so when he learned Brian was hurt in a motorcycle accident, Blake believed he would recover.
‘I'll go see him at the hospital and sit with him for a couple hours and we'll talk. And I'll tell him he is not riding the bike again.”
Blake soon learned it was a lot more complicated. His dad was critically injured, and after ten days in the hospital, was declared braindead. Despite their prayers for his recovery, there was nothing more they could do.
“I went from, everything's gonna be okay I'm gonna be able to talk to my dad again, to he's gone, and just wanting to go talk to my dad at that time. But, you know, knowing I couldn't just tore me up. And it just angered me really bad. I didn't know how life was gonna turn out for me now 'cause he was my everything.”
Blake also questioned God.
‘“When I started praying more-- I felt like that's when I got the bad news and all this other stuff. And then I had the pastor tell me, everything's gonna be all right, and then I have more people telling me everything's gonna be all right, and I just felt like I'm just sitting here getting lied to, God's not wanting to help me out. I blamed God. ‘Just why God? Why are you doing this?’”
In spite of his anger, Blake put on a brave face and began to attend church regularly.
“I wanted to go for my mom 'cause in my mind I wanted to be there for her. I knew I had to be strong. But it was, it was very hard to do that. And I was like, I just, I, I'll go, but I just don't think this is for me.”
Outwardly, Blake made a profession of faith and, at seventeen, was baptized. Inside, he was still angry and wrestling with doubts…and grief.
“I didn't have my best friend. I didn't have my mechanic. I didn't have my teacher, my influence. I lost my hero, you know? And, it's just, it was, it was hard for me to move on from that. I didn't wanna pray. I didn't think God was listening to me.”
The following year, Blake moved out and got his own apartment. He shut God out completely and turned to drugs to try to find peace.
“I just constantly felt lost and constantly felt like there's something missing. Let me find this, lemme try this. Whatever I could try to do just to fill that void and make me not feel like I was.
It didn’t work and a few months later, Blake realized what his dad would say.
“‘I looked in the mirror and I said, ‘Wow, I've let you down. Wow, I'm a disgrace.’ I just felt like it was kind of the end of my rope. And I was like, I'm just gonna go to his grave and apologize and, you know, say a prayer. And I remember sitting there saying, “I'm sorry, Dad. I've really messed up. I've really let you down. I don't think I'll ever be the man that you are. And I'm sorry.” I said a long prayer, asking for God for peace, asking for me to overcome these burdens and help me just be whole again. And it was just like a overwhelming peace just came over me. And right then I was like, ‘I'm gonna be okay.’ And it (laugh), it almost felt like I had someone touch my back. It was like, “Hey, step up. Everything's gonna be okay.” I knew that was the Lord.’”
The peace he felt let Blake know God was with him and heard his prayers.
“When he showed me that, that's all I needed. I just wanted him to talk to me. And he did. That is when I knew that it's time I needed to get right with the Lord.”
Blake got off drugs, and completely surrendered his heart to God. Not long after, he joined an apprenticeship program to become an electrician and, later, married. Blake is amazed at how building a relationship with his heavenly father has healed his heart.
“I'm waking up early, I'm doing devotions, I'm having my quiet time with God, and you know, any morning I skip that, I don't feel right. Whenever I pray, I feel peace about it. Nothing eats me up anymore because the Lord knows what he's doing and whatever he does is what's best for me. And I have to know that. And I do. The Lord always delivers. He does. And he's been good to me.”
Let the Children Play
“Well, we left our hotel this morning. It was still dark outside, and we took a plane to this small town called Kitale. We are at a project called Embrace. Orphan's Promise has been involved here for a number of years, and there's a great work going on with street children. Some are sleeping in a bed for the very first time, but immediately upon arriving, the message of God's love is shared with them.” Terry
“When children arrive here, we embrace them. We love on them, protect them, and teach them about God. We also have guidance and counseling sessions where they have a chance to share their stories. “ Danson – Manager at Embrace
Over the years, 7,000 children have come through here, and over 1,000 of them have been rehabilitated, taken into families, and released into futures of their own.
“Last year was a hard year for my family. My husband passed away at the end of July, and there were many friends and donors to Orphan’s Promise who sent financial gifts. We said, "Let's do something that would honor and be a tribute to him." My husband was a big athlete, a lover of all sports. So, we began to pray, "God, if there's a place that needs a soccer field, show us where that might be." In my mind, I'm not going to lie, I was saying, "How do we find a place somewhere in the world that needs a soccer field?" Right here in Kitale, where Orphan’s Promise was already well involved in the work, one of the founding fathers of this work had a piece of property. He looked at it every day and just said, "God, in my heart, I would just love to have a really wonderful soccer field there." But, of course, there were no funds for it. “ Terry
“There was a desire in my heart, "God, it's my dream if you will have the field here." I just started praying I did not share with anyone. We were just dreaming about the soccer field.” Vitale – Director at Embrace
“Our Orphan’s Promise person who manages this part of Africa spoke to him, and he said, "This is an answer to prayer." It was also an answer to prayer for us because God is so faithful. He never gives us anything that He doesn't ask us to turn around and hand back to other people when it's a blessing. This is the best soccer field in all of Kenya, we're told. I'm so honored to be able to have my husband Andy’s name on it. One of the things we wrote on the plaque was, "It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game," because we're teaching kids moral and character lessons here that matter in their hearts, which they didn't get because they didn't have a fair beginning.” - Terry
“I think how happy my husband would be that these boys will have men amongst them who know Jesus, who are going to be dads for them, who are going to be sitting on the sidelines in these bleachers, cheering them on, and just giving them a sense of their own value. You know, there's so much that you learn in sports that's valuable in life. Being part of a team and the value of practice, letting someone else win and being okay with that. You know, we all get to win, and we all get to lose at various times, but the attitude we do that with makes all the difference in the world. So, I knew we were coming here to do this, and I was very excited about it. But just a couple of days before we left, I was going over my schedule, and I looked at the dates. I had nothing to do with planning this, and I thought, "Oh my goodness, we're there on the 6th of June. It's my anniversary." Today would have been our 43rd wedding anniversary. So, I can't think of a better gift to give my husband than a soccer field in his name and in his honor, that's going to touch the lives of thousands and thousands of children..So, there you go, honey. Happy anniversary. And God, thank you. Just thank you. God is so good, isn't He? How He orchestrates things that we could never do ourselves. He's got a plan, He's got a purpose, and we get to be a part of it. How great is that?” Terry
“Right now, I believe we will be able to attract more kids from the street. This field will serve these people and also people from the community. They will be able to come and play on this field. We will build relationships with them, and we will share the Gospel with them. Thank you, Orphan's Promise, and everyone who supports this ministry. I am so happy and blessed that we can do this together with you.” - Vitale
I see lines of people coming here. This is just the very beginning. I'm so grateful to think that God has allowed Orphan's Promise to help grow it, to make it bigger, and to invite, to say, "Whosoever will may come." - Terry
Group shout out:
Thank you, Orphan’s Promise!
Where God Met Me
A CALL TO MINISTRY
Davey grew up as a pastor’s kid in Birmingham, Alabama. As far as he can remember church was always a part of his life. Although he was a Christian, he thought following Jesus meant being a good person. He had no interest in going into ministry himself, instead he wanted to be an orthopedic surgeon and make lots of money. Davey’s plans for his future changed in high school when he attended a youth conference. The speaker talked about answering the call to ministry. During the altar call, Davey felt compelled to answer the call to full time ministry. The next year, he received a full ride baseball scholarship for a small Christian college in South Carolina. In college, he began attending NewSpring Church which was unlike any other church he had attended. The worship was powerful, the message was compelling, and many in attendance gave their lives to Christ. “God began calling me deeper into the idea of being a part of something much bigger than myself,” says Davey. At the same time, God began to place the same call within an eighteen-year-old girl named Amanda. Shortly after, Davey and Amanda met and began dating. After graduation from college, Davey was hired at NewSpring Church to help launch their first satellite campus. Davey and Amanda (also a pastor’s kid) married and for the next two and half years, the newlyweds worked hard at their dream church. In 2011, they were asked to become campus pastors. Reluctant at first, they accepted the call and spent the next four years getting a church plant off the ground in the city of Indianapolis.
UNIMAGINABLE TRAGEDY
By 2015, they had a fifteen-month-old son named Weston and Amanda had just found out she was pregnant. On Tuesdays, Davey would go for an early morning workout at the gym around 4:30 a.m. When he arrived at his house, he opened the door to a nightmare. Amanda was lying face down on the floor with a pool of blood surrounding her head. Davey said, “Jesus, no. Jesus, no. This can’t be happening!” At first, he thought she had a dizzy spell and hit her head, but when he turned her over her nose and mouth were covered in blood. Her breathing was very labored, and she was unresponsive. He dialed 911. Then suddenly he thought to himself, “Where is Weston!?” He went upstairs and found the door to his son’s room still closed. He could hear Weston’s soft coos from his crib and knew he was okay. When the paramedics arrived, they loaded Amanda, who was in serious condition, into the ambulance and Davey and Weston followed them to the hospital. She had three bullet wounds. The third bullet was still lodged behind her eye. While Davey was at the gym a home invasion took place and Amanda was caught in the middle of it.
Davey leaned into his faith with friends and family convinced that God was going to heal his wife. He sat beside Amanda’s hospital bed through the night. Friends reminded him of what he preached that Sunday at church. It was a message from 2 Chronicles 20 about Jehoshaphat, a God-fearing king who found himself in a grave predicament with little chance of victory. Jehoshaphat chose to trust God which is something he had developed in previous years. Davey was desperate for an act of God. The next day, the doctor came in and said, “There is no brain activity. Medically speaking, Amanda has deceased.” Davey was in disbelief as he tried to process what had happened. “No! This can’t be it! This can’t be how it ends!” Devastated, he said goodbye to his wife and began to try and process why God allowed his wife to die.
To make matters worse, Davey was also wrestling with guilt. The morning, he left for the gym he did not lock the front door. Although the men who broke into his home and killed his wife were the criminals, he somehow felt responsible. The media began blowing up his email and voicemail inboxes. “Some had jumped to the worst-case scenarios and were spreading hate and lies as they concocted conspiracy theories of my involvement in my wife’s murder,” reveals Davey. His church sent a crew to his house to help him, and his family navigate the media firestorm.
JOURNEY TO FORGIVENESS
Two weeks after the invasion, three men were arrested for their involvement in Amanda’s murder. When Davey saw them, he began to feel emotions he had never felt before (anger, hatred, rage, and despair). He thought to himself, “Surely Jesus’s teaching on forgiveness didn’t apply to this extreme of a situation!” To make matters worse, Davey had been warned by investigators that unsubstantiated reports of sexual assault might leak to the press. He says, “My mind began to run away with what could have happened in those last forty-five minutes of Amanda’s life. I felt this unexpected part of me rise to the surface, this part of myself I had never known, and that part of me wanted to kill these men and then take my own life. I just wanted to die…Everything I was living for had been taken from me.” When Davey began to see these men with hurt pasts, each with a devastating story he began the process of forgiving them.
One evening, Davey was on his way home when a song that was played at their wedding came on that ministered to him. He cried so hard that he did not feel like crying anymore. He felt empowered to start living again. He began getting up early to read his Bible and look at Amanda’s prayer journals. Davey also began to see a counselor who helped him find purpose in his pain.
As he began to share his story, thousands of people were being affected. People from all over the city were coming to see how his church was thriving despite the tragedy of Amanda’s death. When Davey would get on stage to preach, he no longer did it to impress, he did it to help people. God was emptying Davey of himself so he could expand him for His glory.
After seven years, Amanda’s attackers were brought to justice in 2022. “I couldn’t believe the finality of it. How long we had waited, agonizing over the process, trying our best to move forward with life, all while the legal side of things remained unresolved. How many times it had been rescheduled and mis tried – and in one swoop, it was finished,” shares Davey. Despite the guilty verdict, the pain he endured from his wife’s death could not be taken away. However, Davey did extend forgiveness to the men involved in the home invasion. Two were given abbreviated sentences for their cooperation with the state while the one who killed Amanda was given eighty-six years with an additional twenty years added for a separate case of sexual assault.
REDEMPTION AND HEALING
In 2016, Davey met Kristi at the gym where he was working out. For three months, they only said hello. Davey felt God had put it on his heart to not pursue anything with anyone until after the one-year anniversary of Amanda’s death. He even kept his wedding ring on for a year after she passed away.
Kristi showed up at his church with her three-year-old daughter. Davey wanted to get to know her better, but Kristi did not seem interested although she continued to attend the church. Four months later, he talked with her in the gym. He learned that Kristi’s stepdad was one of the chaplains for the Indiana Marion County prison system who had regular conversations with the man that had killed Amanda.
On November 8, 2017, Davey asked Kristi to marry him, almost two years after Amanda’s death. They married the following month. Unfortunately, the attendance and giving began to decline at his church. This church had been a healing oasis for those who needed to talk about pain and trauma, but as quickly as it grew it also seemed to stall out. During this difficult period, Davey had started a side project called The Nothing is Wasted Podcast. As he talked with others about healing from trauma and tragedy, it also helped him find purpose in helping others through their pain. His executive pastor pointed out that maybe God was drying up the church to bring about a new season in Davey and Kristi’s life. As painful as it was, Davey and Kristi closed the church in 2019. They knew exactly what God wanted them to do: help others navigate pain and trauma. Davey shares, “In every crisis, in every upending event, He’s right there inviting you into a redemption story. One that heals you and leverages the work He’s doing in your life to heal others. He promises not to waste any part of our stories. Eventually, He will work all things together for your good and for the good of those your story touches.”
For more information please visit www.NothingIsWasted.com
CREDITS:
Author, Nothing Is Wasted, (Forefront Books, 2024); Founder and Director of Nothing Is Wasted Ministries, a nonprofit that helps people who have experienced trauma and tragedy to discover God’s purpose in their pain; Former pastor; Speaker; Host of the Nothing Is Wasted Podcast with more than three million downloads and 300 episodes since 2018; Graduate of Southern Wesleyan University in South Carolina; Married to Kristi; Three children: Natalia, Weston, and Cohen
The Dream That Brought Me To God
“Something about that day just, just didn't feel right to me. sort of felt like the Holy Spirit was, was dealing with me, was, was nudging me about a warning. My life changed in four minutes that morning dramatically.” Toby Hemphill recalls July 10th 2023 - He says he was driving to work when a red pick-up truck entered his lane while attempting to pass a loaded tractor trailer. He says, “All I saw was him, flying around the tractor trailer he's coming right at me and he's right in my grill. I immediately jerked the wheel to the left and I hit an 80,000-pound tractor trailer truck fully loaded.”
Soon after, Toby’s wife Kim received a call from his employer, wondering why he hadn’t shown up for work. Kim says, “I immediately knew that he was involved in an accident. No one had to tell me. I just knew that if he hadn't been to work on time, that something terribly went wrong. I called our best friend, to have her to pray for me because I didn't know what I was about to encounter and to pray for him because I knew something was terribly wrong.”
As Toby’s body lay trapped in the car, he says his soul was somewhere out of this world,
“I was completely out of my body, my soul was just, through this huge black tunnel running toward this bright light that was not blinding, It was pulling me toward this light. The peace, the love, I knew that I was entering Heaven. And this light was so bright, I wasn't afraid. And I had that peace and, and joy and the love that I felt there was more than the love that I felt here on earth with my, I mean, it was just amazing. And as I got closer to the end of the light, I began to see, arms of people. I felt guided by angels as I'm going toward this light. And as I'm getting almost to the end, the peace was all over me. The love, the nothing to be afraid of. I, I had no fear of anything of that what just happened. I had no pain. I had no pain at all. God had given me a new body. The flowers and the, the, the field, the colors were thousand times brighter than what we see here on earth and I, I didn't wanna leave. It was amazing. And all of a sudden I heard his strong voice telling me it was not my time that I had to return back to my body and then he sent me back to a broken body. And that was hard. That was, that was hard to understand. All the pain come rushing back into my body, I'm trying to really figure it all out about what happened, I just had this peace that was this love that I knew that I was gonna be all right even though I couldn't move. I heard one guy yelling out to one of the firefighters, telling the other firefighter, ‘Hey go get the jaws of life equipment. He is alive. We need to get him outta here.’”
Toby was life flighted to Carolina’s Medical Center where he was treated for blunt force trauma and multiple broken bones. His church community and friends prayed for his survival and recovery. Toby says, “During the 16 days I was in ICU trauma, I just felt the overwhelming peace of God near me and his love and support was just amazing.”
Kim remembers, “I can't tell you how overwhelming the peace was for our family. We all felt it. So many people rallied around us. We just are so very grateful for that.”
Toby faced a difficult and painful recovery but remains thankful for the glimpse of eternity he experienced and god’s presence with him through it all. Toby says, “There is no way I could have gone through what I went through the last 12 plus months of my life without God being the center of my life, of somebody that I can turn to just to help me with the day-to-day struggles of the injuries and the pain. And He has been there. What God blessed me to see was just a glimpse of his greatness of Heaven. And we have so much hope as believers of the home, the life after this life. I'm thankful for God sparing my life that day. And I'm thankful for him sending me back. I still have my family and that God has given me a second opportunity to live here on earth, to witness, to be a vessel, to help others. And I don't want to miss that opportunity, for what God has for me to do.”
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