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CBN.com -- Once again I sat on my couch feeling hurt and defeated. So many times I had trusted people, things and ideas and thought I had finally been successful at finding joy, peace and happiness.
But, the sadness and unrest deep within me seemed to encircle and envelope me more than the plush pillows on the couch I had sank down on. The dark coldness of the room matched the feelings I had.
As I sat and sipped on my cup of unhappiness, I kept hearing a faint knock at my door. It was probably the same person that always seemed to come knocking on my door at these times when I wanted to be left alone in my misery.
While continuing to knock, I would hear him say : "I'm here to help, please let me in." I could not quite explain it, but opening the door seemed to make fear run rampant within me. At other times I tried to ignore it, but he continued gently and continuously knocking.
My cup of unhappiness seemed to have grown cold, and I no longer wanted to drink from it. Oh, how I wish He would stop knocking! Finally, I decided I would open the door but just to tell him to go away. Then, I would immediately close it before he could steal the only thing I had left.
I got up from the couch but fully expected to come back to the sadness and frustration that waited for me there. As I walked toward the door, fear increased within me. Each step seemed to have lasted years.
When I reached the door, I took a long labored breath and slowly exhaled. The knocking continued. I placed my hand on the handle and began to turn it. I started opening the door but something stopped me. Looking up, I realized I had not unlocked the security chain.
Again, I took a breath and unlocked that. At that moment, I was ready to face the person standing there. I wanted to tell him to go away, slam the door shut, and slip back within "my" walls of security.
When I opened the door I looked up at the person who had been continuously knocking on it. I was speechless. All of the speech that I had rehearsed in my head was gone. I looked up into the most beautiful loving face that I had ever seen.
His eyes, without words, spoke volumes of love for me. I grasped His hands that were outstretched to me and pulled Him inside. This person who had been continuously knocking had just stolen the only thing I still held onto, my heart.
As He came in, light and warmth flooded every corner of the dark cold room that I thought I had been living in. He held out what seemed to be a book, but when I opened it there was food and drink in it. The food and drink from this Book gave me new life and energy that I had never had before.
"I have loved you for a very long time," He said. "That's why I kept knocking."
Looking at Him, I didn't want to speak. I just wanted to listen. Finally, I could stand it no longer, and I fell into His arms. He held me close with arms of strength that I had never known.
As I rested my head on His massive chest, I could hear His heart. Each beat was a note of peaceful music to my heart and soul. I closed my eyes and finally rested.
Resting in His arms, I felt Him kiss the top of my head and the oil of happiness and joy flowed over and in me.
Slowly I sat up and looked into His eyes. They were eyes that knew my every thought before I could put them into words.
"Jesus," I said. "Yes?" He responded. With tears flooding my eyes, I continued. "I'm so sorry that I took so long to answer your knocking. Thank you, that you didn't stop."
The brilliance of His smile reminded me again of how much He loved me. It was then I realized He had not "stolen" my heart at all. I had freely given it to Him and what I received in return would last for eternity!
"Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear My voice, and open the door, I will come in to him and will sup with him and he with Me" (, KJV)
He's knocking. Have you answered yet?
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