Finding Love After Devastating Break-Up

“I just entered a lifestyle of just getting absolutely slammed and plastered.” Judah recalls, “My mindset was just like, ‘Screw it. I don't even care anymore.’ I'm just so hurt by this. I'm just gonna hook up. I don't wanna have a relationship. I don't want to get hurt anymore. I just wanna party.”

Judah Lupisella wasn’t always a wild partier. Raised in a Christian home, Judah made an early profession of faith and was baptized when he was 13. He was a good kid, until his junior year of high school when he fell in love. Believing he’d found ‘the one,’ their relationship quickly got physical. He says, “We kind of think like, I can go to first base and second base and third base, but as long as I don't hit a home run like I am staying sexually pure. And that is not true at all. My foundation, all that I was, was based in that relationship.”

Then suddenly, after just four months of dating, the girl dumped Judah. He says, “I remember that just crushed me. I felt like my whole world was falling apart. I went home, I told my parents that this girl had broken up with me. I was like, I'm just gonna go spend the night with my friend at my friend's house.”

Judah’s mom, Christine, remembers that night. She says, “He acted as, as if, well, you know, it's not that big of a deal. 'I feel bad, I'll get over it. I'll move on.' He didn't let me know how deeply he was hurt.” On his way out, Judah stopped in the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of liquor. He says, “It was just like, 'I'm hurting.' The thought pops in your head, 'pour yourself a glass of alcohol.' Sounds right.”

However, for Judah, it didn’t stop there. Nearly every weekend he was getting drunk and smoking pot all in an effort to numb his pain. He recalls, “I just entered a lifestyle of just getting absolutely slammed and plastered. In the moment you are feeling fulfilled. And then the high wears off. That buzz wears off.  You go back to that thing that temporarily fulfilled you. If there was any guilt, I think I just pushed it down because pleasing myself meant more to me than doing the right thing. Christianity is just a thing I do. Church is just a thing I do. It doesn't impact my life. It doesn't change how I behave. As long as I'm not hurting anybody, then what's the problem if I just wanna go out and have a fun time.”

Hiding his double life from his parents, Judah lied to them often about his whereabouts. However, his mom felt something was off. She recalls, “There were lots of nights. I was woken up in the middle of the night and I just felt called to pray for him and I would pray for him a lot. I also wanted him to know that I loved him and that I was there for him.”

Judah also became obsessed with his looks and strived to have the perfect body. He worked out, kept a strict diet, and even tried steroids to improve his physique -- he was never satisfied with the results. He says, “So, when I looked in the mirror, I just felt like I wasn't enough. I felt like I wasn't good enough. I felt like I didn't look good enough. I really cared how people viewed me.”

For the next year and a half, Judah tried to find happiness in alcohol, drugs, and improving his image, only to end up miserable and alone. Then after a wild night of partying, he decided he’d had enough. Judah recalls, “I'd been living this lifestyle and running after partying almost as hard as I could. And I was just at a point of this is just not fulfilling me. This is just so empty. I remember just literally being in a bathroom, literally screaming, ‘God change me.’ It was just like a cry of desperation. I felt broken. I have nowhere else to look, but God.”

A few days later, a friend invited Judah to help at a Christian camp meeting. During the evening worship, Judah felt convicted about his sinful lifestyle and for just paying ‘lip service’ to God. He realized he needed to fully surrender control of his life. Judah says, “It was more than just trying to be a better person, it was a total heart change, a total commitment. I'm doing it your way now 'cause my way is not working and doing what I think is your way and my strength is not working. It's, ‘I surrender.’ I felt something I had never felt before. A fulfillment that compared nothing to any drug, any woman, any pornographic material, anything. Fulfillment, like no one can explain and even a peace that doesn't make sense.”

Judah went home and immediately confessed his sins to his mother. She says, “My vision of who I thought Judah was as my son was different. It's like the curtain was pulled back and I saw everything, and I saw how deep the hurt was. I am just so thankful God used me just to plant little seeds and just to keep tapping him with, with the little Holy Spirit texts that I, that I sent. I'm just so thankful God was there with him.”

From that night on, Judah fully committed to God. His behavior changed and he even got re-baptized. Today he is happily married and fully surrendered to God. Judah loves sharing how God filled the hole in his heart when nothing else could. He says, “Nothing in this world can compare to what He has to offer. When I look in the mirror now, I just see someone that God loves enough that even though He knew all the mistakes I'd make and even still mistakes that I do make that I was worth dying for.”