‘Pained’ Musician Finds Freedom at the Cross

THE INVISIBLE MAN

Josh White grew up with an absent father addicted to alcohol and drugs. His mother tried her best to protect and provide for Josh and his brother but life was hard. He explains, “Due to the endless uprooting, I always sat on the outside of the social order—invisible. It was as if the world refused to acknowledge that I existed. Sometimes, I wondered if I did.”

Josh struggled to develop a relationship with his dad and when he tried, communication proved difficult. As much as Josh realized that his father was a stranger, he still loved him. His dad’s refusal to take any ownership of the broken relationship didn't help. 

FINDING HIS PLACE  

By nineteen, he was writing songs. At twenty-one, he had a band that quickly gained a large following. At twenty-two, he had a record deal with a major label and by twenty-three he was opening shows for bands that achieved real fame. When his album was released and his first single dropped, things didn’t go as planned. Josh explains, “The song had been picked up a day early by a competitor station that did not have national prestige.”

This made the larger stations upset that they were scooped. So, they refused to play the song. Two months later, he was married, his record label dropped him and he found himself working for minimum wage in a record store that had a mural of his record painted on it. Josh was devastated. He shares, “This was the crisis, needed to birth in me a hunger for what I actually needed. For it was two years later, while reading the Bible, that I surrendered to the One, whose grace met me with an all-consuming love.” 

He and his wife Darcy began attending church and got involved in ministry. In 2008, they planted Door of Hope, a thriving church in Portland, Oregon. 

Over the years, communication with his father continued but was sporadic, difficult, and draining. Josh had forgiven him for not being there and tried to lead him to Christ for years. His father wanted no part of it. On his deathbed, Josh prayed with him and had assurance that he accepted Jesus into his heart. As he took his last breath, Josh was there.

THE POWER OF THE CROSS

In his book, "Stumbling Toward Eternity," Josh focuses on the cross where the crucifixion of Christ shows God’s love for us on display. The Apostle Paul referred to the cross as a stumbling block because the Lord’s death was so offensive. Christ died a humiliating and tormenting criminal death. Yet, for the followers of Jesus, this horrid display was also the most beautiful act of suffering. His sacrifice represents the Christian's reconciliation with God. 

Josh explains, “God is calling His people back to the center, back to the cross. We are amid a cultural shaking that has left much of the church exposed and reeling… If we remove the offense of the gospel, we lose Jesus.” 

 
THE LAW OF MIXTURE

Many new believers assume that when they accept Christ suffering will cease. Navigating life as a human being with a sinful nature while also having a spirit inside of us that longs to draw closer to God, can be conflicting. Josh calls this the Law of Mixture. 
“This is the paradox of existence—we want to be ‘ourselves’ but never seem to be satisfied with the self we currently are,” Josh explains. Paul also wrestled with this duality when he wrote “So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me” (Romans 7:21). 

Josh explains, “The hardest thing in life is to live well. Perhaps that is why it is so hard to be honest about the difficulty of living… We must remember that God can take the dissonant notes of our suffering and weave them into His redemptive song. What matters is not why I suffer. What matters is that God cares.”

MUSICAL BACKGROUND

Since coming to faith in 1999 Josh has written and recorded 12 albums: 3 albums for Tooth & Nail as Telecast and 9 albums under his name through Deeper Well, a label birthed out of Door of Hope in 2012.

He will sing “Forgiven” from his album entitled Josh White & Josh Garrels (2018 Gospel Song Records/BEC Recordings).