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Reconnect with Your Spouse

Jim Burns


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How’s your marriage? Are you growing or decaying? Far too many marriages are disconnecting because two people who were very much in love have distanced themselves because of good intentions with the kids' activities.

One weekend some time ago, I was feeling a bit disconnected from Cathy. It had been a very busy “kid season” and an extra busy work season. I asked her on Sunday evening to take Monday off with me and just hang out. At first it was difficult for her to imagine changing her Monday schedule, but she did. And I’m glad she did. We enjoyed a long walk at the harbor, ate a fun lunch, and then went shopping! Now shopping is not my favorite activity, especially when we were searching for a new bedspread. We had our old one for the past 15 years; it seemed to do the job for me!

After we arrived home, we immediately went straight into the kid responsibilities but we both had more bounce in our step because of our connection time. If it has been a while since you had a meaningful connection time with your spouse, make a decision today to make it happen. Be proactive and take the responsibility to celebrate your marriage relationship.

Here are 10 creative connection ideas:

1. Take him/her away for an overnight. Make all the arrangements for babysitting, reservations and whatever else is needed and then tell your spouse.

2. Kidnap your spouse for the day.

3. Go for a walk in the woods, beach, mountains, mall.

4. Buy something new for the house.

5. Husbands, watch Monday night football with your wife… Just kidding!

6. Attend a play.

7. Take a fun class together.

8. Do something you haven’t done since you were dating.

9. Take an exercise class together.

10. Spend some extra time praying together.

Printed by permission of HomeWord.  For additional information on HomeWord, visit

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About The Author

Image of Jim Burns

Jim Burns is president of HomeWord and has written books for parents, youth workers, and students. Jim and his wife, Cathy, and their daughters Christy, Rebecca, and Heidi, live in Southern California. Visit for more.