"I needed to love my wife the way Jesus loves the church”
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“We partied a lot, you know, he had a lot of money to spend. And that was usually like a new outfit every weekend so we can go out to the clubs,” says Danielle Gonzalez.
“It was money on, you know, alcohol. It was money on-on drugs, you know, we were smoking a lot of weed. We were doing cocaine, you know, that was pretty much the-the first years of our, of our relationship together.”
Omar and Danielle Gonzalez brought a history of drug & alcohol abuse into their relationship. Omar was also addicted to sex and pornography.
Omar remembers, “I was not thinking about her. I was thinking about myself. It was all about me. It was me uh leaning on what I wanted, instant gratification to uh meet my needs. Getting drunk, drugging, watching porn, having sex.”
The couple dated on & off for seven years.
When Danielle found out she was pregnant, they decided to get married. Danielle's partying life slowed down, but Omar's did not.
Danielle thinks back, “We had, you know, really had a rocky year that year. Uh it felt like we were both kind of going in different directions. Our priorities, our goals, you know, they weren't in line as a married couple. They weren't in line as a family.”
Danielle didn't see any hope for their marriage and left Omar.
“When I realized that she was gone,” Omar states, “my marriage about to be gone. I started realizing that it was me the problem. That I needed something bigger to help me.”
Omar searched for something bigger and found it attending a friend's church.
“The guy that was teaching or facilitating the class, start talking about the power of the Holy Spirit, I still remember that.” Omar’s eye glistens as he continues,
“He started talking about the-the power of what the Holy Spirit does when He dwells in you, and how He's your companion, every day. And all of a sudden, I felt something really deep in my heart, and I stopped the class and I said, "Guys, wait a minute, wait a minute. I want that. I want what you guys have. I want to commit life to Christ."
I prayed the good confession to accept Christ in my heart. It was the greatest moment of my life, to know Jesus personally. Two weeks later I-I got baptized and I-I continued seeking Him. Reading every day, the Bible, reading His Word.”
Several months had passed and Danielle saw a change in Omar.
“I could tell that, you know, his words and his voice, it wasn't coming from a-a place of anger anymore. It wasn't coming from a place of I would say hate anymore, which, you know, I felt like for a long time that's, you know, that's what our levels of communication were at. And I just felt like it was better.”
Omar enthusiastically states, “He put that desire to restore the marriage, you know. Because that's what I ultimately wanted, is my marriage. But alongside, I discovered Jesus, gave me a bigger desire for Him, for His kingdom, for humanity, not just my marriage. I need to see that compassion that Jesus Christ sees in us every day. I needed to model that. I needed to love my wife the way Jesus loves the church.”
“He shared with me that, you know, his thought process is different,” says Danielle. “That he wants to be better, that he wants to really grow as this new person. a servant, a follower of Christ. and that was never a priority, you know, in our marriage. That was never a priority...in my life as a child growing up, and I feel like it wasn't really in his. But I knew it wasn't coming from nowhere. I could tell that...his attendance at church and his willingness to be baptized, it was coming from a genuine, a genuine heart.”
Omar and Danielle moved back in together and he eventually led her to Christ. They have left their life of partying behind and today their marriage is thriving, with Jesus in the center of it.
“I am so grateful that God has restored my marriage,” says Omar. “Because we can really focus on our calling for the kingdom and we're grateful for what He's done in our life. Not just restoring our marriage, we get to do His will, which is uh preaching the Gospel to people that don't know it.”
“I've lived in a marriage that was of the world and I now have that same marriage that is of Christ,” states Danielle. “And I absolutely believe that you can get through it, and you can get through it stronger. It's just, what is your willingness to give grace? You know, do you really grasp that concept? Do you know that you're not perfect, and that...our Father gives all of us grace, but as long as we learn and we move on and we put Him at the cornerstone of our lives, you know, we can, we can absolutely get through it.”
Omar smiles, “Jesus is not done with your marriage. God is not done with you. God created your marriage to be a relationship and a covenant with – between you and God and your spouse. So don't give up.”
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